Happiness in a Nutshell #68 – What Matters Most?

What Matters Most?

Psychological studies show that happy and successful people have something in common. What do you think that something is? Are they all trendy, famous, skinny – or millionaires?

Here’s what the studies show: successful people ALL have a network of friends or family they depend on. One amazing study, The Harvard Men Only study, lasted 70 years. It followed 268 men from their entrance into college in the late 1930’s. It monitored how each man handled setbacks and disappointment – and who flourished.

In 2009, director of the study for the last 40 years, George Valiant, said he could summarize the study’s finding in one word. The critical ingredient for success he said was: “Love – full stop”. So what do we do with this information?

We adjust our priorities. The strategy, “First I’ll be successful – and then I’ll fix my relationships” doesn’t work. Love comes first.

Secondly, we can adopt some simple habits to nurture our relationships, for example: • be a “good finder” – we look for good things in friends and family • be flexible – we don’t demand that people always agree with us • be imperfect – we don’t have to always be right • let people know we love them, and • give those we love our full attention – and sometimes, switch off our mobile phone!

In a Nutshell

Love is our foundation.

Wise words from Andrew Matthews